Perspectives on Challenged Family Building

Welcome to part two of our post about “value competency.” As Part One explained, trauma causes children to develop values that are often at discord with those of the adoptive family. Thus, “value competency” is the ability to live—long-term—with children who, due to their traumatic histories, have a different set of values than the adoptive [...]

Over time, we have put forth many posts to help alleviate the negative behaviors presented by children with histories of trauma. Frequently, adopted sons or daughters—adopted very young or older, internationally or domestically— develop or enter the adoptive family with a lengthy list of behavioral difficulties. Lying, stealing, aggression, destroying household objects and toys, bedroom [...]

As a parent, do you feel like every request becomes a bargain? You ask, “Would you please bring your laundry downstairs, and your child replies, “I will if you let me go to Tommy’s house.”  You say, “It’s time for dinner.” Your son or daughter replies, I’ll sit down when you let me have a [...]