Perspectives on Challenged Family Building

Derrick is now 16. His parents, Ellen and Roger, adopted their two nieces, Jill and Joyce, when Derrick was 11 years old. Jill and Joyce are now also in their teens. Joyce has integrated into the family nicely. Jill, on the other hand, has been very hurt by the trauma she endured in her birthhome. [...]

Welcome to part two of our post about “value competency.” As Part One explained, trauma causes children to develop values that are often at discord with those of the adoptive family. Thus, “value competency” is the ability to live—long-term—with children who, due to their traumatic histories, have a different set of values than the adoptive [...]

Over time, we have put forth many posts to help alleviate the negative behaviors presented by children with histories of trauma. Frequently, adopted sons or daughters—adopted very young or older, internationally or domestically— develop or enter the adoptive family with a lengthy list of behavioral difficulties. Lying, stealing, aggression, destroying household objects and toys, bedroom [...]